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Reply to topic  [ 6 posts ] 
 For the over 30 crowd 
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Joined: Sat Feb 19, 2005 12:00 am
Posts: 2559
Location: Tampa, FL
Post For the over 30 crowd
THE SPOILED UNDER-30 CROWD!!!

I miss Saturday morning cartoons Yellow_Flash_Colorz_PDT_32


If you are 30 or older, you will
think this is hilarious!!!!

When I was a kid, adults used to
bore me to tears with their
tedious diatribes about how hard
things were when they were growing
up; what, with walking
twenty-five miles to school every
morning... uphill BOTH ways yada,
yada, yada!

And I remember promising myself
that when I grew up, there was no
way in hell I was going to lay a
bunch of crap like that on kids
about how hard I had it and how
easy they've got it!

But now that... I'm over the ripe
old age of thirty, I can't help
but look around and notice the
youth of today. You've got it so
easy! I mean, compared to my
childhood, you live in a damn
Utopia!

And I hate to say it but you kids
today you don't know how good
you've got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn't
have The Internet. If we wanted to
know something, we had to go to
the damn library and look it up
ourselves, in the card catalog!!

There was no email! We had to
actually write somebody a
letter...with a pen! Then you had
to walk all the way across the
street and put it in the mailbox
and it would take like a week to
get there!

There were no MP3's or Napsters!
You wanted to steal music, you had
to hitchhike to the damn record
store and shoplift it yourself!
Or you had to wait around all day
to tape it off the radio and the
DJ'd usually talk over the
beginning and @#*% it all up!

We didn't have fancy crap like
Call Waiting! If you were on the
phone and somebody else called
they got a busy signal, that's it!
And we didn't have fancy Caller ID
Boxes either! When the phone
rang, you had no idea who it was!
It could be your school, your mom,
your boss, your bookie, your drug
dealer, a collections agent, you
just didn't know!!! You had to
pick it up and take your chances
mister!

We didn't have any fancy Sony
Playstation video games with
high-resolution 3-D graphics! We
had the Atari 2600! With games
like 'Space Invaders' and
'asteroids' and the graphics
sucked! Your guy was a little
square! You actually had to use
your imagination! And there were
no multiple levels or screens, it
was just one screen forever! And
you could never win. The game just
kept getting harder and harder and
faster and faster until you died!
Just like LIFE!

When you went to the movie theater
there no such thing as stadium
seating! All the seats were the
same height! If a tall guy or some
old broad with a hat sat in front
of you and you couldn't see, you
were just screwed!

Sure, we had cable television, but
back then that was only like 15
channels and there was no onscreen
menu and no remote control! You
had to use a little book called a
TV Guide to find out what was on!
You were screwed when it came to
channel surfing! You had to get
off your a$$ and walk over to the
TV to change the channel and there
was no Cartoon Network either! You
could only get cartoons on
Saturday morning. Do you hear what
I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL
WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled
little bastards!

And we didn't have microwaves, if
we wanted to heat something up we
had to use the stove or go build a
frigging fire.... imagine that!

If we wanted popcorn, we had to
use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing
and shake it over the stove
forever like an idiot.

That's exactly what I'm talking
about! You kids today have got it
too easy. You're spoiled!!!!!!!!!

You guys wouldn't have lasted five
minutes back in 1980! Oh yea, and
a seatbelt was Mom throwing her
arm across your chest every time
she hit the brakes.

Regards,
The over 30 Crowd

Yellow_Flash_Colorz_PDT_08

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Mon Feb 25, 2008 8:04 am
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Forum Maggott
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Joined: Mon Feb 18, 2008 12:00 am
Posts: 134
Post 
Kids these days with their Internet and their video games and their romantic novels and their Clorox Disinfecting Wipes and their premarital sex and their messenger bags and their Abercrombie & Fitch and their digital cameras and their collapsible workstations and their hybrid cars and their nicotine patches and their acoustic guitars and their homosexual media and their Triple-16 lawn fertilizer and their Jewish comedians and their pornography and their automatic windows and their homeland security and their democratic House of Representatives and their contraceptives and their fruit flavored ribbed textured latex condoms and their 99.9% effective birth control pills and their hormone-injecting fishhook inserts and their anal sex and their pulling out and their ejaculation onto external phisiologies...


Mon Feb 25, 2008 12:02 pm
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Joined: Sat Oct 22, 2005 11:00 pm
Posts: 2436
Post 
That's written by Ernie Cline.

"When I Was a Kid" - Ernest Cline
http://www.ernestcline.com/spokenword/

He's got some really funny stuff, and that one's pretty much totally true.

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Mon Feb 25, 2008 2:49 pm
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Joined: Wed Dec 07, 2005 12:00 am
Posts: 826
Post 
ya u guys got owned.

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Mon Feb 25, 2008 4:40 pm
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Joined: Thu Aug 11, 2005 11:00 pm
Posts: 2251
Location: Orlando, Florida
Post 
LOL! The seatbelt thing brings back so many good, and bad memories.

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Mon Feb 25, 2008 7:50 pm
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Joined: Thu Jan 05, 2006 12:00 am
Posts: 8388
Location: London
Post 
Ninja, I LoL'd.

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Tue Feb 26, 2008 7:11 pm
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